To be a liberal ... (very funny)

To be a liberal...

To be a liberal, you have to believe the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of funding.

To be a liberal, you have to be against capital punishment, but for abortion on demand-in short, you support protecting the guilty and killing the innocent

To be a liberal, you have to believe that the same public school [teacher] who can't teach fourth graders how to read is qualified to teach them about sex.

To be a liberal, you have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding Americans are more of a threat to the country than nuclear weapons in the hands of the Red Chinese.

To be a liberal, you have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical, documented changes in the brilliance of the sun, and more affected by yuppies driving SUVs.

To be a liberal, you have to believe that gender roles are artificial but being gay is natural.

To be a liberal, you have to believe that businesses create oppression and governments create wealth and prosperity.

To be a liberal, you have to believe that self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to earn it.

To be a liberal, you have to believe there was no art before federal funding.

To be a liberal, you have to believe the military, not corrupt politicians, start wars.

To be a liberal, you have to believe the NRA is bad, because they stand up for certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good, because they stand up for certain parts of the Constitution.

To be a liberal, you have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides are not.